Jingle bell jingle bell jingle all the way! (:

Went SKCC to study with ex-colleagues, followed by a good dinner in compass point after that. It has been long since I could focus this much! (: Anyway, saw many Christmas decorations in the mall although its not even near the actual (probably gonna start selling their Christmas left-overs from last year again!). Have no idea why but it seems like everything is just so jolly with Christmas, filled with love, warmth and pure happiness. Haha, okay nvm I am just talking nonsense because physio mid term is over and I just spent my entire sleeping and watching shows.(: To think the real thing is coming in 2 weeks time!

Anyway something random but soci is driving me crazy. Knowing how the society function to stabilize itself, even at the most basic level, is sometimes to cruel. It's just telling you that this is how the world goes and until you've garnered enough support to overthrow it, all you have to do is to either stand by yourself and a deviant or accept the way things are so as to camouflage into the big world led by culture. We discriminate to create social unity between 'us' even though it comes at the expense of 'them'. Someone else is suffering so that life would be just a little happier for us. We are taught to label people using their superficial features or characteristics so that we can label others the next time we find someone similar. Its like getting labelled as a 'RJ kid' - you are supposed to be smart and know everything in the world. If you do great, everyone attributes it to the school and not to you who have put in so much effort. (No i am not upset actually.In fact, I am still super grateful to be one of the privileged few who got the opportunity) You are not an individual, just a small part of the society, a mere social actor trying so damn hard to blend into the culture, And here's the weird thing: Why is there even such thing as a culture when everyone is actually a deviant? Nobody should be identical to anyone else. Or is everyone just wearing a mask in front of others to accept the general culture? In fact, we are never truly truthful to anyone, telling them all your real thoughts so perhaps by saying culture, we are only forcing people to wear their social masks? Haha, As can see, I am not talented in soci at all. Can't really apprehend what or how this whole thing actually works since it doesn't have a definite answer.

I play too safely, only going for things I have confidence in and avoiding matters that does not have a definite ending. And sadly, life is just so unpredictable. Maybe thats why I am not too good with life, because unlike math and science, I will never know the answer until I've walk the journey. The sense of insecurity and sometimes excitement on the way, I don't like them. Hence, I wear my social mask and pretended that everything is going to be alright.

It will be alright.